Kem Cho ?

 sculpture of shaking hands near the Capitol Mall , Sacramento, California

Obama does feel like a very ordinary individual. Specially in light of his very forgettable presidency that has swiftly gone from "Yes we can" to "No I can't".  If he makes an effort to learn to say greetings in a new language ; it must really be quite important. A number of heads of state and heads of the governments traipse through the halls of United Nations in New York . Quite a few of them wing their way to Washington DC and some do get to see the POTUS  when on official business. This was not one of those trips.

Modi's recent trip to US was unique in many respects and strikingly different from the trips of other Indian prime ministers in living memory. Firstly it was such a huge turnaround for an individual to be greeted officially at the white house  when just some time ago he was considered not worthy of even a simple visitor visa. Several plans to bring him over by his group of overseas supporters in the past were stymied by the state dept. bluntly refusing the visa. But then there were elections in India and the same man accused by many (proven by none) for various crimes including mass murder; won them comprehensively. Fair and square.

It was a bitter pill to swallow  for a lot his accusers and their friends in the media. They are still in a state of shock ; either taking recourse to  catatonic silence or acting like  headless chicken ; wildly lashing out in sheer desperation . To its credit , US has however smartly eaten the crow.

Modi hit all the right notes. Judiciously addressing his constituency back home in India by sticking to his religious fast; his ethnic sartorial sense and his use of Hindi. His visit to ground zero and casual interaction with a local gathering hit their American establishment and society targets with pin point accuracy. He did not forget his American Indian support group either and his Madison square garden appearance among them was described by his critics as " rock star reception"!

Exceptionally  high on optics and  colorful sound bites , can the trip  be termed a  success?  Well if you disregard the congress spokesperson the answer is yet hidden in the future. On a personal level Modi was vindicated and how! . On a national level the trip was able to reset the US - India relationship to an even keel. A relationship that had seen  considerable degradation in recent times as seen by the Khobragade affair ; spying on Indian leaders  and the American embassy school affair..... It  was tit for tat that had all been going south recently. There is nothing here  to jump with joy yet as I believe too much of an American embrace is nearly as bad as too much  of American animosity. Ask Pakistan !  However a healthy ,balanced, economic, diplomatic and political ties with the US  are desirable and must be valued.

A huge part of the trip was focused on invigorating  the economic relationships with the US business and industry. There are clear pointers that a significant headway has been made during Modi's meeting with the captains of industry and large investors. The confidence generated by these  meetups even pushed India's credit rating up . A lot will depend on what has been asked of in return and what promises Modi is able to keep. Inflow of new foreign investment will depend on reduction of red tape; rationalization of rules and relaxation of norms governing these investments. Modi has promised to clean up the mess in six months , so we will have to wait and see how  it pans out in the coming months.  Modi is banking heavily on foreign investment to generate new jobs for the young demographic and I will not be surprised to see him push the envelope to achieve a breakthrough.

That brings us to that  special group called "American Indians". Very vocal in Modi's support this group has for sometime now bet on Modi. Commonly held belief that they are a bunch of rich professionals with a lot of political  reach and far right view is far from true. This is pure stereotyping . Reality is that they are as varied as the Indian society itself. Come to think of it what is common between a  New York cabbie  who arrived from Moga ; a silicon valley techie that arrived from Tumkur and the owner of a 7-Eleven who arrived from Bhuj ? Nothing really. To see them as a homogeneous entity is not only wrong it is down right insulting to them.

Most of them feel a strong connection to India and have  strong emotional, cultural  , economic and family ties to their mother land.  People often make the mistake of either putting them on a pedestal as "they  made it "or demonize them  as "self centered, crass runaway's " . Best way to treat them is as one would treat any other Indian. They were the biggest external factor that helped Modi win his massive mandate even when most did not have a vote. Modi understands that  power. He did not give them any largesse except a promise of easy visa, but he was able to give them a rallying point. They see in Modi as someone that could bring about the changes they want to see in their land of birth and I would not be surprised if this group gets an expanded role in the coming years. 

So imagine a special correspondent of "Ku Klux Klan Today" travels to Harlem where a basketball game is being played and starts interviewing some of the African American fans gathered there. The interviewer then proceeds  to use derogatory and demeaning terms for Martin Luther King while reporting from the site and tells the gathered fans that they have "no class". It is quite hypothetical and totally improbable ;but would you be surprised if you had to fish the correspondent out from bottom of the east river?  I know even a rookie journalist is not so stupid as to conduct his interviews in this reckless fashion. What do you know ? Life is stranger than fiction and heartburn is such a bad disease. Makes you loose your head . This scenario actually got played out during this trip at Madison Square  garden ;about six miles via 5th avenue from Harlem.  Just change the  news organization ;ethnicity of  the fans and their hero with same initials "M". Oh , another thing - make it a veteran journalist.  I am not so sure of his professional reputation but luckily he is safe and hope he gets over his heartburn soon . He might be offended but I would love ask him 'Kem cho?".

On a sour note I was  a little disappointed by the subdued role played by the Indian foreign minister Sushma Swaraj  during the trip. I would have preferred a more visible use of her substantial talents. Apparently it was  not mandated. 

It is complicated!

Ronald Regan transitioned quite smoothly from being an actor to being a politician; eventually reaching the highest office of the land. Wisdom of the street has it that another actor Arnold Schwarzenegger  had a great chance of repeating the feat but got stopped in his tracks since he was born abroad and thus barred by the constitution. A number of Indian actors have joined politics and some like Jayalalitha have managed to reach the seats of power at the provincial level. None have reached the national level yet. Many players and sports heroes are in the parliament as well. However even when they are not nominated like the iconic Tendulkar ;they have attracted very sparse public following as politicians. In the last election former Indian cricket skipper Mohammad Azharuddin who was contesting on a Congress ticket from Tonk-Sawai Madhopur seat in Rajasthan, lost  his own election by a whooping 1,34,000  votes.

On the other side of the border however another cricket captain  Imran Khan actually managed to gather over 7,700,000 votes in his favour. His party PTI riding on his charisma and rhetoric snagged 28 seats. That's when the problem started because Pakistan national assembly has 272 seats for which a direct election is held and he did not get the mandate to rule. The ruling party PPP fared no better and managed about 32 wins and a shade less number of polled votes than Imran Khan. The individual who received more votes than both PTI and PPP put together was Nawaz Sharif of PML(N). He received the biggest public support ; nearly 15 million votes and 126 seats in the national assembly. Zardari of PPP did not expect to win so he quietly retired to his corner but Imran Khan became more than angry at his comprehensive loss ; he became incredulous!! Yeah it's complicated!

He expected to take the country by storm and march into the PM's office; specially when the establishment ( read army) as well as the radicals ( read Islamic fundamentalists) were in his corner. So he believes that Nawaz Sharif stole the election from him. Specially he is suspicious about four seat in particular that he lost. Four seats, that would not reach him any closer to the power! There are several questions Imran is not asking. Starting with how did  Nawaz manage that  sleight of hand? He was in opposition when elections took place. Who helped him. Zardari was in power and if Zardari helped Nawaz , why did he not help himself instead?

Secondly there is a parliament ; an election commission; and the supreme court in Pakistan. How come Imran does not use those mechanisms to redress his grievances. They are all part of the democratic system he supposedly believes in!  How's that he never raised a voice when during the election campaign terrorist were killing and terrorising Awami National Party workers to keep them away from the election campaign? Is this because Imran's party benefited from this; or  is it because he is sympathetic to these methods and enjoys  their company ? Is this not "cheating" ?

We are not sure what this great saviour of the Pakistani people thinks about it since he has not said anything about it. What we can be sure of though is that he is coordinating his moves against an elected government with that of Tahirul Quadri. A maverick cross between Lenin and Pope ; that is wearing a Turkish cap and carrying a Canadian passport . This  oddball character does not believe in the parliamentary democracy as the world understands it . He is on record about total revolution and complete breakdown of the present disposition being his goal!  Both are together weakening an elected government, degrading its authority and hold over the national affairs; creating a general disturbance and an atmosphere where an army coup will be seen as heaven's blessings! All of this is happening at this crucial juncture when Pakistan needs a stable and consistent government more than anything else. A government that can deal with the severe security, fiscal and other attendant challenges in the coming months as the US forces exit Afghanistan.

 Imran khan used to fulminate about drone attacks. Now a days he keeps his council to himself about it. All he is concentrating on is  to dethrone and destabilize Nawaz sharif. . He may succeed yet and he has no doubt about being absolutely in the right. Matthew 6:1 has a teaching about self righteousness. Luckily Imran khan does not read bible. At age 61 he is a man in a hurry . After all the sooner he can create a "New Pakistan" , sooner he can contract another "nikah". He would like that . His words not mine!

So is all this because he is lonely and itchy in his old age and wants  to get married again ? Did I tell you it is complicated ?

The Thing Around Your Neck!

Surprises can be very predictable as coming events do cast their shadow before. We can all be a little bit of a Nostradamus if we try. At least some of the  times. So Indian election are over and the result was surprising only in the sense that so many people were actually surprised by it! In fact they were surprised by the fact that they never  believed that it will be as surprising as it turned out to be.

It has taken them a while but people of India  have finally realized that bringing in minority governments election after election has done them incalculable harm. It has vitiated the political atmosphere and given rise to serious policy paralysis. It has encouraged horse trading and deal making; substituting tokenism for governance. It  has institutionalized poisonous vote banks and given rise to endemic corruption at massive scale that has eaten away at the nation's vitals - all to the detriment of people. So this time around  people;  the real owners of the country , snatched the country back from the middle men; commission agents and hustlers of public interest by simply pressing a different button on the electronic voting machine.

It must be the sign of the times. It is the age of the internet. Individuals are slowly taking over control of their lives. They  are ceding some too but that's another story. Most of us remember the good old days when you had to get out and travel to the nearest retail outlet if let's say you wanted  a shirt. You would go there and choose one from 'his' limited stock and pay him 'his' price. The shopkeeper was smart and he would sweet talk you  to believe that you got a good deal. In reality he sold what he had and you paid what he wanted you to pay. On top all sales were final.This retail model is slowly taking a beating in today's world. Now you can and should go online, compare several suppliers and look for the most economic deal. You can also talk to other users and get a feedback on their experience with the supplier. You order it online if and when you are satisfied and you do not need to go anywhere. Your order is usually delivered to you at your door step in short time.

Retailers are not very happy about it though. In fact one of my friends who in the past made a pretty penny selling large screen tv's in a big retail store for years is soon to be out of a job because hardly anyone buys from a physical store and that outlet is shutting shop. Customers shop online and mostly get a better deal. Sadly he is not making enough commissions to pay his bills any more.

Similarly we have this background groaning noises now being made by those very cutthroat mobsters who were selling their captive voter's interest for their own benefit for years. Their business model is shot to hell by this election result.They can't swindle any more. Some dealers had an exclusive tender for one or the other group of people; some had a special shop for  poor. Some had the dealership for this caste , some for  that caste and some had a dedicated showroom for different caste combinations. Oldest dealer in town had the sole franchise for 'secularism'; newest had the one for 'honesty'.  All of them are out of a job because voters went hi tech; talked to each other; got together to make a bigger pool and chose a source that arguably has some warts, but comes with very good customer references; nice fresh extensive  stock and verifiable value for money. Well .....tough luck Shylock !

Institutions and organizations like individuals have to bear their own cross. They all know it. What is harder to come to terms with is that we all have to carry our own millstones around our neck too. Big enough to sink us. It is not our challenges that does us in ; it is our own lack of foresight; faulty planning; inadequate preparations and an inability to take tough decisions that sets us back.

Congratulations are due that after decades of non performing coalition  governments, India has taken a right turn - in all senses of the word ! Surprisingly they now have a coalition opposition instead. I am not so sure how that will  pan out in the end but  in the coming months we are likely to see a lot of churning in their ranks. Some will fall by the way side , some will switch their side. A lot of heads will roll and  some roles will reverse. A new  opposition leader may emerge even though today they are facing a crushingly morale sapping and monstrously comprehensive defeat.  Hopefully it does soon; since someone will be needed to keep a tab on the new supplier. 

Although she has a long five years window but it would be interesting to see how soon will  Priyanka Gandhi look down and realize that the millstone around her neck is a four letter word called vdra.

Cat's Nine Lives !

 

six weeks old "Ardene" 

Many decades ago as a little boy I wanted to be a tank commander. I had visions of myself riding atop a noisy green tank, barreling down the street and letting go a shot from time to time. Strangely in my visions I never had an enemy firing back at me. Some time later I switched my vision to becoming a fighter pilot. By grade five I was clear that I will be a fast bowler; hurling one toe crushing delivery after another at the hapless batsmen. It all however began some years before. As soon as I was born some doting adult envisioned that I will grow to become a doctor so that became my nick name. It stuck for years till it became apparent around grade six or seven that though doubtful , I may amount to  some thing but a doctor can not be one of them. Not with the grades I get in science and mathematics. Well turns out that I became none of the above. All these dreams were fascinating while they lasted but they were childish and so long ago that it seems like it was another life. Maybe if I had the proverbial nine lives of a cat............

Well we do not have another life. Even cats do not have another life. Their nine lives are a myth substantiated by the fact that they are agile and seem indestructible as they kind  of always land on their feet. Humans do not have that luxury. We can and usually do land with a thud. At times it is hard to get up again - ever. 

Kejriwal reminds me of my childhood. He does not seem to know what he wants to be. A PM or a CM ? A CM who sits in protest against his own government to send two lowly cops on leave; or a CM that calls himself an anarchist who will not  respect the sanctity of the republic day ? A provider of free water and half rate power? A common man; a con man? A crusader against corruption perhaps - but his original target Shiela Dixit is currently enjoying the power and prestige of a state governor. All those papers that kejriwal used to show as proof against her have vanished and with it has vanished his will to follow his accusations up. He has found new things to do. Past ten years that UPA has been in power were marked by one massive scam after another ; kejriwal can not see them. He has to take a three day tour of Gujrat to find corruption.

One day he declares that he will fight against Modi in Varanasi. In the afternoon he changes his stance to include "if people ask me" and by nightfall he declares he will fight him from Vadodra as well.... oops! No , no; not from there . Ah, at least for the time being ! It seems that he is like my little kitten jumping here , running there and taking a leap from top of the staircase. Climbing the house plant ,digging the soil out and clinging to my trousers and scratching my leg with her sharp paws. Yeah ! he acts a lot like her  just not so likable. And he does not have those nine lives. In a month or two  when he falls he will not land on his feet like Ardene does.

Honeymoon !

Honeymoons are kind of dreamy ; surreal ; out of the world and  exhilarating . In short they are quite an interesting event. Both for the participants as well as for others around it. Trouble with it is that they simply do not last very long. Reality hits quite too soon and you have to wake up to the truth. Years ago I went on one myself. Third day into it  and we sat down for a nice candle lit dinner in a beautiful hill station when it happened!  My new wife lovingly served me from the cheese dish she had ordered...... and wrecked my dinner. Well I abhor the stuff and I reacted  sharply with my usual acidic humor ; she felt insulted and started crying in her usual manner. Realization of what we have got into and will have to live with ,dawned on both of us that very instant. It was a huge revelation. There, that was the end of that romantic evening and with that our honeymoon went out the window.

It happens in public life too. Vinod Binny found it recently. His honeymoon with his aam aadmi party lasted for about 24 hours after that party came to power. He realized that this is not the common man's party he had been fighting for since last year or so ; and his party realized that Binny is  the kind of a common man they do not like and they would rather divorce than let him voice his uncommon  opinion. They have thrown him out. This honeymoon is done. Well Binny  may join the club headed by Anna and Kiran bedi.

Common man of Delhi is already in process of  waking up from the vivid dreams they had of getting their power bill slashed in half and  turning the tap and finding water streaming out. Water which is free at that. It is turning out to be quite a pipe dream.How can one even believe in such a dream is beyond me but anyway give it time and every dream eventually ends. Dream of ending corruption is another one. So nobody asks why does a beat constable ask for a bribe? He does so because his Inspector asks for one. Who asks for it  because his boss and his boss's boss does too. This does not stop till it reaches the very top. Unless you stem the source, this corruption will never end.

How beneficial is it go to war ;bring an entire city to stand still ; create a constitutional confrontation; threaten civil disturbance and disobey  existing laws? All to send two lowly cops on leave! Obviously it will not stop corruption or  give even a small relief to the common man. It is not even cost effective ;  it  however takes a disastrous hue when this crisis is  precipitated by a newly minted Chief Minister of all the people there are . Such heavy weights ought to go for the big fish of corruption. Big fish they promised to catch before they got elected! Why do they not do so is anybody's guess. However I suspect that being in power at the mercies of those same corrupt  to the core lot has something to do with it.

People have to pay the price of going to honeymoon with Kejriwal before dating him awhile. Turns out that he is the only  good man left on this earth that you must agree with or else! Turns out that he is intent on breaking apart and smashing everything in sight in order to bring about an order that no one knows anything about. Least of all he himself. He has a law minister that respects no law; a children's affairs minster that lodges a police complaint against a child playing cricket and a party muse that thinks nothing of telling sexist and racist jokes publicly.  His entire caboodle seems like they are running around like headless chicken. Loose tongues; aimless illegal actions and vague ideas are combining in a murderous cocktail for the common man. He is failing miserably in  governing one city but  planning to be the Prime Minister of 1/6th of all humanity.  Failing which he will be very happy if the government formation can be brought to a stand still because the general election mandate has been fractured! Who else wants to have an anarchist? At least it is not me.

India needs to improve upon systems, laws, policies and methods. Progress demands vision; a strong will to act and a proven model to follow. You can not achieve it by breaking laws and making people beggars. Beggars that are looking for "free" things to survive. Progress is achieved by enabling people to make their lives better by providing jobs. It is achieved by improving infrastructure; access to education and healthcare.It is achieved by making clear laws and following them. In the coming months there will be another chance for people to wake up. Dream merchants will come peddling their wares again. Check their vision , check their record. Dreams do attract but it is the reality that matters in the end. Do not vote for the scam ridden corrupt lot; do not vote for people that take corrupt for a friend. Do not vote based on caste ; creed and vague disruptive ideologies. On this republic day think about the country and think about how we can make it better. Let the honeymoon be over and start living the truth or you'll regret it for the next five years. Please!

If you are wondering what happened to my marriage after my honeymoon fizzled out. Well , you do not want to be in my shoes because nothing much happened! Life took over from that moment onwards and at the time of writing I  am still married to the same individual. All I had to do was develop a thick skin that is kind  of immune to tears and a pair of ears that are deaf to periodic doses of tongue lashings . And most importantly I had to learn to love a lot....... a lot of cheese!

Yet another Messiah!

There was nothing in the beginning. As humans started to appear among other animals; they acted alone. Individuals lived by a personal and primal code. They related to each other and even to other animals on a needs only basis. Most other times they preferred to interact with natural events; natural forces and with their physical environment. Life was simple, needs were basic and everything one needed to live was within the scope of one's own exertions. If one needed anything , one could go out and get it. If one needed to be saved from anything , one would go out and save oneself or perish in the attempt. Well; things did not remain so for very long.

Humans developed bigger brains, as well as their ability to speak and got an analytical system of processing information. Almost overnight they switched en mass into a different zone, leaving behind every other species that roamed the earth. Seeds of the trouble were sown at that moment. Humans were no longer just another animal!

Soon they learnt to live in groups; at times violently competing.They learnt to cultivate their food and build shelter for themselves. Things were still not that bad. Most everybody was his own farmer; his own hunter; his own baker; his own doctor and his own architect. This moment was the pinnacle of human progress . Everything since then has taken them south. So really what happened in the human history is that some people got good at one thing or the other and either decided to specialize or got forced by circumstances to specialize. I do not know what . But in the new order of things you were no longer your own farmer if you were the butcher. Or your own builder if you were the doctor.... and so on. So a power struggle ensued. Some groups had more power over others as they decided to use war or trade or even religion as a controlling tool. At times they controlled water sources or trade routes or even natural resources. Politics in its broader meanings had come to fore and these controlling acts  continues to this day.

Where a handful of simple red ochre  dust applied to oneself connected them with the "unknown" ; their ancestors and the nature and brought them solace and spiritual connections. Now It was no longer enough to do so. Faith got organized . Rites and rituals got codified and virtually written in stone. Unknown and the nature coalesced in the concept of "God". This became another potent tool to streamline and control societies. Humans lost individual control of their spiritual world as well.

All of these developments and the interplay of these new forces turned  humans into  dependent weaklings and gave rise to a new radical concept of "The Messiah". Someone that will come and deliver us from our wants and our shortcomings; since we can not do anything ourselves anymore! Every society and group has seen countless numbers of messiah's throughout history. Some declared themselves to be such; some were anointed such and some acted such. With so many of them batting for us ; why on earth have our problems multiplied ? The fact is that Messiah concept does not work and is not likely to work. No body and no one can get rid of your challenges until you act yourselves. Whenever someone promises to do so , be alert because you'll only get distracted;  further divided and end up deeply disappointed. Messiah's keep rising because we  keep looking for them. They will continue to exploit this longing in the human mind and humans will probably never stop hoping for miracles!

Even when all line losses; distribution snafus ; obsolete equipment ; graft and corruption are mitigated ,there is not enough power generated that'll allow for a lower tariff. Sufficient potable water is not available that could allow for  free distribution. If and when it is done  it can only be on a selective basis; with an eye on the potential vote bank and will create haves and have nots. Even this very minimum will have a staggering cost. Cost  which is coming right out of your pockets ;unless you make some other sacrifice where there is not much left to sacrifice . More importantly it does not even begin to address the fundamental challenge of generating stable and plentiful power for everyone or putting in place effective water resource management. If you do not solve the basic question with a strong resolve and long term view; these very issues will get bigger and bigger , as they have over the years. Even beyond the reach of such band aid solutions. Just forget about being delivered you are likely to sink deeper into the cesspool and soon.

Pied pipers always play a melodious tune however the results are  rather odious. Learn from history and beware of Messiah's . Especially when they wear a Gandhi cap!